I know you’ve all been worried sick about my John Thomas ever since you read this post. Oh, crap, I forgot to give you a **TRIGGER WARNING**! This post will, once again, be discussing some sexually sensitive subjects, so if that isn’t your bag, baby; go sit in the corner.

That’s right, Patrick Swayze, I went there. However, I won’t get all braggadocios about it since you are literally a ghost now and I don’t want you thumping me on the back of my ear or singing Henry The 8th, I am!, over and over all night.

Anyway! The subject of that post I linked to above was about how I think my old liver Balrog’d my John Thomas on the way out of my body when he got the old heave ho during my transplant. The last paragraph of that post read as follows:

Gandalf fell into that pit and battled the Balrog, finally defeating him. It cost him his mortal life but he came back as Gandalf The White, a much more powerful wizard. Here’s hoping for the return of John Thomas The White! For now, I am still waiting in the Ent forest for him to show up.

Me – back in that post.

Guess what? Last night, John Thomas The White showed up in the Ent Forest! Turns out that all that John Thomas needed was a little intravenous steroids to get his staff back up and casting magic spells! Yes! That’s right! I had sex last night! Sex with a woman! A real woman! That woman was my wife and if I can believe the feedback, she was quite pleased to make her long awaited acquaintance with John Thomas The White! You don’t need to get any more details than that. Yes, you’re welcome.

So, in a really weird round about way, I owe the discovery of this most potent of elixirs known as steroids to my new liver, Oliver. As you might have already read on my last post, he has been rejecting. Due to that, my doctor had me take intravenous steroid treatments, daily. I think Oliver knew that the lost John Thomas at the bottom of the Mines of Moria needed that particular stimulant as opposed to the Afolas (Viagra) that had no effect. He played some tricksy maneuvers to put me in that situation in order to get John Thomas reborn as The White! An admitted risky little game, but one that got me playing with a bat and balls again.

My intravenous treatments are done now, and there are signs that Oliver is settling back down. I won’t know for about another month while I continue a treatment of pill form steroids. Will John Thomas loose his magical abilities as Oliver gets back to a more symbiotic relationship with the rest of my body and I stop the course of steroids? I don’t know. But, I do know one thing. Imma swing that staff as much as I can before I find out.

I’ll let you know. You’re welcome.

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